A typical clueless RICS Chartered Surveyor

Surveyor inspecting the brickwork of an old wall

Clueless RICS Chartered Surveyor

This is a typical example of the sort of stupidity we see almost daily. We did a survey on a beautiful 1930’s cavity walled house – built entirely with lime and soft brick. It is absolutely pristine – internally all the walls are covered with the original lime plaster and limewashed. They have been covered in a thin layer of textured paint and wallpaper which peels off to the limewash. The house is BONE DRY. Thermo hygrometer readings throughout the day showed about 8 g/m3 in all the rooms, in a house which had not been occupied for weeks, and no heating until the day I arrived. There was no sign of any dampness anywhere. All external cavity vents were open and worked. Chimneys vented. Ceilings original lath and plaster and in perfect condition. Internal floors about 9 inches above ground level. Drainage perfect. The house is utterly, completely pristine. NO work is needed.

The idiot of a surveyor – I should use stronger language – told the buyers all the plaster needed stripping and they should get Peter Cox in to do a damp survey. They were then told by an equally fraudulent Peter Cox that £5,000 worth of stripping was needed and the house had rampant rising damp. All the ceilings apparently need overboarding, adding significant weight to the ceilings without any need – no load calculations having been done either.

The surveyor – his report is in photo below – clearly hasn’t a clue what lime is – the wording here is some of the most incredulous rubbish I’ve ever seen, and indicates a total incomprehension of the subject:

“Based upon the age of the property, it is likely that the plaster is a form of render with a lime base. This lime can react with water and if a distemper paint has been used and there is the presence of damp then the lime may have reacted…”

I’ve said before that many RICS surveyors are incompetent idiots – and this totally bears out everything I continue to say about them. This bloke should not be allowed near a dolls house. Rics urgently needs to re-train all of their surveyors into understanding building pathology and building materials – or give up any pretence at surveying old houses, and stick to Wimpeys. The sheer incompetence of this idiot nearly cost the client £10,000 of their retirement funds to do work not needed – but also which would have coated the walls with cement and gypsum, making it unbreathable and damp into the bargain.

The pricing for damp proofing – NOT NEEDED – was £5,200

Cost of overboarding ceilings – NOT NEEDED – £2,500

Cost of idiot to do incompetent survey – £950

Total incompetent and fraudulent cost of works not needed £10,000 give or take a few pennies.

All due to an incompetent RICS Chartered Surveyor. He also failed to mention the whole house was repointed in cement which was trapping moisture into the outer leaf, that the bricks had been damaged by angle grinding, and various other issues.

I’ve said this before and will say it again – RICS is ultimately responsible for the stupidity of these people. They NEED to retrain their surveyors. They need to stop them using ‘damp’ meters, and educate them properly. Until then, we will continue to see incompetence on a staggering scale, which is simply unacceptable.

RICS – do something about it and earn your logo – ‘The mark of property Professionalism’..